Adam Smith, the author of The Wealth of Nations, believed that “empathy is an intellectual activity that takes into account circumstances, motives, luck, social status, and human character of the person.” The moment we blame another person’s actions, we examine the appropriateness of those actions. Adequacy is a state of neither excess nor understatement. If everyone else thinks a person is bad but I advocate for that person by saying, “I can understand,” then I approve of their actions. This situation is called “mutual sympathy.” In our lives, we can be egocentric in some cases and relation-centric in others. The more mutual sympathy exists, the more relationship-oriented our thinking becomes. Both too much and too little can lead to tiredness or dissatisfaction. Pursuing happiness means finding this adequacy. - Joseph’s “just my thoughts”
Speaking negatively to others stems from my discomfort. Positive language fosters respect and happiness in relationships. This isn’t merely due to the “power of positivity”; it’s how our brains have evolved to interpret it. When asked, “Why don’t you study?” the negative framing prompts the brain to release cortisol, which ramps up stress. Consequently, the brain associates “studying” with unpleasantness. Conversely, if you say, “I appreciate your studying even while you play,” the message shifts. Parents shape children; husbands influence wives, and wives impact husbands. - Joseph’s “just my thoughts”